Spending my life in parts has left me with no true friends I think. I lived in Pakistan until I was eleven and left all my school friends to move to Bahrain. Then spent my teenage years in Bahrain and made friends there. When it was time to move again, I had to leave all that. I moved back to Pakistan to a new adventure, without Email/Skype/Facebook during those days meant that those friends had better things to do.

Leaving all behind in Bahrain was especially hard as all I knew and learned was in Bahrain. But in Pakistan I did make friends and good friends, but once I settled in and had a social life, I had to move again, this time to USA, to unchartered territory.

USA was specially a different game; I didn’t know anyone or anything. Learning the ropes of life on my own for the first time was hard and kept me busy though. Friends in USA is a different scenario, it was especially along the lines of friends who were opportunist. This meant that whoever became a friend was a friend for a little while until his or her opportunity or personal gain was fulfilled. Then it was off to other people. Also one thing here is that people do tend to move all over the place, so someone you know today might not be in your area for long and might move somewhere else due to job, family or education. This means that they were there for a little while and what you thought was a friend was an acquaintance actually. I can’t think of any true friends that I can fall back on; I do have some friends that I am proud of but they are not here in USA.

I did mak
e one friend who I thought that was a true friend (literally thought that), who I could rely on in my bad times, sadly in my bad times he was the first one to dump and run away from me. It was harsh and hurting, it still hurts but I can say this that he helped me a lot in life so not holding a lot against him. Although I haven’t forgiven him, if I was at fault then that doesn’t matter but if I wasn’t, then I will see him on the day of judgment Inshallah, I am glad he did abandon me as I would have otherwise trusted him with my life, my family and most probably would have been surprised and shocked to see his actions, if I needed his help in worse Times.

Allah is my Lord, my friend, mytrustee and everything at this point but sometimes it is nice to have someone who you can call or sit down to talk to and open your heart. As of now that doesn’t exist and I doubt it will ever be. Time for such friendships have come and gone, it would have helped to stay in one place to have such luxuries. Lack of true friends, cousins or family sometimes truly sucks.

All I just can say

hassbunallah wa ni’mal wakeel

‘Allah is sufficient for us, and how fine a trustee (He is).’

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